Forgive

 I am finally off and I got sick.  I am thankful I was able to make it but sad because I won't be able work out.  I have this headache and it is just annoying.  

So many people that angered me.  My  two staff who is lazy and my husband who had a hissy fit before his appointment. 

I used my anger and just stressed eating things all week.  

Then last night I had a dream where my hair was falling out and I kept on losing things.  

Another opportunity to trust God.  Praying for healing so I can do church tomorrow and be healthy Tuesday afternoon for Christmas.  

I can't change others but I can rely on God to change me.

It Just Keeps On Getting More Stupid

 Today my toxic aide came in at 2 and expected to get paid for half day.  My lazy aide left 20 minute early.  I ask my boss and I am the one who gets into trouble.  It just keeps on getting more stupid.  So much for crazy.

Learning From Mistakes, Looking at my hubby a new way

 Yesterday was the craft fair.  I was overcome with the lines, noise and close proximity of people.  Moving forward I will check out the first person and get out of there.  

'

'I have been not letting Mike's constant harping and adding things he could of easily doing into letting him take control.  I have also been not worrying as much, making decisions one at a time, pausing.

God knows better

Fair

 I feel like I have been thrown under a bus.  First of all the aides in my classroom who have lied, been lazy and taken too much time off seem like they are getting away with murder.

I set up great field trips and they seem to get cancelled.  The recent ones were not educational.  Two groups of people went today to similar trips.  

I am grateful for God's protection but seriously I feel under the gun.  Glad there are only three more days of school.

Living Sacrifice

 Yesterday as a whole was a good day.  We celebrated Gingerbread House day, made gingerbread man crafts, houses digitally and learned about the holiday.

Last night we went to a concert and it was good.  

But yesterday the old present devil had to rear its head. And the blame game for putting mistakes on others also reared its head.

I watch the liar and the lazy keep on getting away with stuff.  I want to scream and wonder doesn't anyone see the crap other than me.

It is definitely a situation where I need to pause and let God move.

Yesterday I also had a situation where I had a parent call to complain about a ring his son stole.  I listened as she screamed into the phone and I was reminded that when you are angry you can't see things clearly.  It takes the responsibility off yourself and tries to put it on others.

I can't change myself, solve other peoples stupid but I can ask God for direction.  

On the Altar a Daily Killing of a Sacrifice

 After discovering my earliest childhood memory with gifts and being ignored have plagued me my entire life I am realizing that this is my challenge I must daily and sometimes hourly deal with.

Gifts:  Sandra continues to give gifts in front of me despite the fact we told her not to do it. Every time I see this I choose to put it back on the altar.

When someone yells it triggers my past and I choose to pray and put it on the altar.  I use the situation to prepare me for the future.

When I mess up in front of my teachers or admin I realize I will make mistakes and my job is to do the best I can and celebrate bouncing back when I learn what to do next time.

Anger from others and myself is not worth it because it drains my energy and makes me more suspectable to illness.  

Anger from not helping me or directed toward me or gossip.   These are things I must learn with giving it over to God and letting Him direct how to handle it. 

Glad tomorrow I took off. 

A Run, a book, a message on Moody and hearing the voice of God

 Monday I found out I was going to be a back of the pack pacer for a race.  I was going to cancel but I felt that the Lord was going to open a witnessing opportunity.  And he sure did. I was listening to Moody Sat. and I felt led to read an old book about Christmas All is Well.  And lastly I felt that I need to back off on talking about the toxic aide and keep more stuff to myself.  

Thursday was super crazy.  The aide accused me of being hostile.  I had reminded her numerous times not to be on her phone, not hug the students and buy everyone presents.  And she made coffee during lessons.  I tried to talk to her and the Lord really gave me the words to say.  Even the words convicted me and how I had not listened in the past in my job assignments and what I had learned from the situations from the past.  

Last I got to sing the National Anthem.  It was not me singing but the Lord.  So cool and amazing.  

Well tomorrow is two tough IEP meetings.  One is a sue happy parent and the other is a parent who has not done what needs to be done for his son to be successful.  I pray the Lord helps me be bold as I run both meetings and wisdom or let others say the right things.  It is not about me but about the Lord. 

A New Opportunity

 It has been quite the week.  After leaving my situation at work I have been reassigned at a place where the students are working at getting ready for work.  I  also talked to my therapist and she said I had been right about the gaslightining all along.  

I have also enjoyed mty time with the bunnies, husband and starting to pursue some of my own hobbies.   God is good. 

Yesterday and Grateful

 Yesterday was just awful.  I had to spend the whole day worrying about my meeting with my boss.  And the meeting was hard.  Some of it was true and some just plain a lie.  I feel so defeated with trying to do the best thing and it was the wrong thing.

I am thankful for Brandon my union rep, I will definitely get on the union once the dusts clears, my sister in law who supported me, my husband, my dad praying with me, my relationship with God and that He has my back. 

Another perspective

 I am grateful for a peaceful day at school, learning how to get closer to the Lord, seeing things from another perspective, weekend, a good run and most of all that I belong to the Lord.

I woke up this morning to some new revelations.  Yesterday I got a list of inventory.  I felt bad as I began to log everything the school had bought.  I felt so betrayed that I had tried to do the right thing.  Then I felt bad helping the gym teacher bring in the water toys and I got in trouble for that.  

I am learning that I need to do whatever my boss tells me to do that is ethical, not worry about what is not  right and then leave the its' not fair to the Lord.  I am committed to a study of Who I am in Christ .

Grateful 8

 I am thankful for a supportive staff, my husband, my ability to fix things, bunnies, good healthy food, a productive day on Wed, and most of all I walk with Christ and not by myself. 

Grateful 8

 Swallow Cliff, Bible Group, Starbucks, Disernment, Mom Husband, Day off and Most of all God who has my back 

Greatful 8

 I am thankful for salvation, getting out five minutes early, working with a new student, having a good run, new haircut, Taco Bell out of my system, calm evening, clothes that make me happy, being productive

Thankful

 I am thankful for seeing seven bunnies on my run today.  I had a nice run and prayed about some things.  I realized I am just experiencing spiritual warfare and I just need to just trust God.  

better day

it was a better day.  I was able to find common ground with love with Konnor, walks with Matteo, Muhammad as a helper, and hugs with Jonas.

I was also able to start with make peace with the toxic people i work with and stay humble.

Also I had some help with my day.

It is still super tough and I am totally spent.  But it is better. 

Review of H and L

 As I reflect upon yesterday I realize I am human and am doing the best I can.  

I will document and demonstrate what I am asked to do.  I will not worry about others who have evil intentions and realize they are hurt people.

I will not be a complainer because I have basically been dupped this summer and my school has.  

I will realize that hurt people hurt me.  I will ask the Lord to make peace when I can, navigate with people and learn what I need to learn. 

I will remember bad people even if it takes forever will get found out. 

Highs and Lows

 I am thankful for a good workout.  Getting a lot accomplised at work and figuring out stuff.  

I am thankful for waking up before the alarm and using it to pray, I am thankful for good staff, getting through unexpected stuff.

I am giving to the Lord about people who try to find mistakes, having mistkes made that are not your fault and seeing things through a different lense.

12 more days to go.

Grateful Sunday

I am grateful for having a child ask me to sit with them.  Teens who thought I was cool, SC, Fun Shirt, Fun Sunday, a message that spoke to me, a student who sent me a meaningful card, Tommy who hugged me and finishing a half marathon.  Today I am not sore and I did SC 8 minutes faster. 

Mike has been quite the pill lately.  When I make a mistake he constantly complains.  He does not want to do what I want to do and I feel like our relationship is one sided.  Lord give me wisdom to deal with this.

when someone refuses to believe the truth and chooses to associate with unsafe people

What if I did not care and did it anyway and God knew this would happen

 As I reflect on yesterday I remember that God knew yesterday would come.  He knew everything would explode and that I would  be in the middle of this big mess.  But it is one I can learn from and then work on making it work.

Ultimately I know that the Lord is in control of all and that it was not a surprise to him stuff happened.  I am getting the people pleaser out of my system and I am walking with purpose.

Trust in God

 Today was just plain awful.  My one aide was just had it for me and my friend.  Then I had to talk to a HR counselor.  It was so embarrassing and I asked for help and I was made to feel like a fool.    I am so thankful I am NOT going to have a classroom next year.  I am determined to be honest in my dealings.  I trust God that I will continue to be employed and that the Lord has his hand on me.

Please bring justice God. 

IT got worse

 I came in today and things went from bad to worse.  First my paperwork that was to be done was not.  Then I got cornered with everything and then there were lies and lies on me.  I shared what had happened with my boss and she did a Freudian slip and told me the person in the wrong she was going to appolgize to.  I also got knocked for stuff that was not my fault.   Moving forward I will do summer and the the floating thing but when I get old enough I think it will be time to be done.  I am done.

I am grateful for a mom who listens, a prayer group that prays,  Super bunnies, a nice house to live in, that I could see my words were no use, and that there are only two days left. 

Awful to Blessings

 Yesterday was just awful.  Two of my staff were gone.  The one left was mad she actually had to work.  My SLP was trying to get dirt on others and I am stuck making the day as smooth as possible with people cancelng out and acting like they were in preschool.

Today I had my E group.  I realized I was not alone in the things of God and how one year later my life is so much better.  

Today will be hard.  Staff will continue to be difficult.  I will stand up for myself. 

Weird Day

 I saw some things at SC today that were pretty weird.  I prayed for them .  Then a police officer purposely kept the light on red on the way home so catch some red lighters.  Life is pretty weird. 

Things I did right and wrong

 Calling mom after I get off work is a bad idea.  I am stressed and I just need to chill with the Lord.

Worrying about how I appear to parents is dumb especially if they are not going to be seen again.

I need to prepare kids for the stations before all the hoopla comes.  I need to not get upset at people doing wrong things. I can't control a husband who is having a tantrum, someone who leaves half day, or someone who does not come to work and expects me to do her job and mine.

I prayed before I reacted with one of my staff, I encouraged my staff to pray instead of complain, I ignored stupid and kept on teaching and last thought about what I would do different next time.

I kept my ear placed to small voices from the HS.  

Thank you Lord for putting me in the right place at the right time. 

Warning Bells

 This week has been a mix of peace, new beginnings and learning to say no.  On Sunday I found out they are discontinuing the Watch Party.  I think I knew it was time but as everyone else was mentioning what am I going to do I felt led to pray for the group.  Also one of the guys in the group really made me feel uncomfortable.  Then yesterday I was teaching and everyone was fighting or telling me what to do.  It was pure chaos but I trusted the Lord and just kept on doing what I was doing and it was amazing how the Lord helped me.  Last one of my staff is openly looking for another job.  She used an AI to help her do her resume.  I initially thought it was great but then the little warning bells came on and I realized it was a way to get information about her identify.  5 more days of stupid. 

Blessings

 Today was graduation.  It was a nice day.  I am thankful for my students and that I got in a nice walk at lunch.  I can't change others but I can change myself.  I am also grateful for people getting what they deserved. 

Thankful

 Today I am grateful for unanticipated surprises, new opportunities, good Bible study, good helpers, nice students, medicine and looking forward to dinner

Little Blessings

 I am grateful for today for walking, being able to be outside, I like you from Mateo, Smiling faces, almost of single digits, some hand holding from students.

More than a Chance

 Lately I have been blown away about the more than chance stuff lately.  I am so blessed with everything.

I am thankful for the sermon yesterday, good food, a pretty day, seeing my family, Swallow Cliff, a good pastor,  a nice job and a happy place to work at, husband and bunnies. 

Blown Away

 I am just amazed.  I am in the midst of rapid change.  I am in the midst of starting another job this fall.  I have decided to not want to be part of the worship set with looking at old people perform and that my purpose is to minister not to be on a show. I just see God's hand in my life from the past two years.  So amazing.

Got Questions

 Yesterday I made a mistake but now I am learning to pray first and not react to others.  Honestly it was not my fight to fight.  

Second there was a discussion yesterday about protests.  I did not know how to answer them.  But I am thankful for GOTQUesstions and it answered them.

Mike was disagreeing with me on stupid things today.  I am learning that many battles are not worth fighting.  

Grateful Sunday

 I am grateful for a nice day at Swallow Cliff.  A workout, a good message from Dr. Cloud, music that uplifts the soul, good time with friends yesterday. 

God helped me do it right

 Recently I have been reflecting on the things at work I have been doing right.  I have been also discovering that the reason I was so addicted to singing and races was that it made people happy.  But what makes people happy does not always be what God wants. 

I am learning more and more to just lay back and trust God.  Like loosing things and then quickly or at the right time they are found. 

Grateful for small things

 I am grateful for being able to poop, enjoy the day outside, enjoy my students and their sense of humor, a good show, sunshine, Running sleeves, ipods, saying goodbye to stuff.

Dogs Barking Are LIke People

 Sometimes and often I encounter a bully.  Today there was this dog that was barking.  When I left it it was whimpering.  It makes me think that first of all the dog did not learn to not bark.  And it was neglected. 

May I take the pets and opportunities that have been given to me and use it for the right purpose.  

9 Miles

 

I had a good run walk.  Still not fast but it is getting there.  I am thankful for beautiful weather, God's strength and wisdom,  and his blessings.  Yesterday I was called Mrs. Chapan and I ordered a cake for Mother's Day.  I am thankful for good endings and new beginnings.  I confronted my aide and earlier in the week a teacher in the class.  I made decisions without making people happy. 

Animals

 I am blown away with the wisdom of God.  Mateo had a tough day and we figured out animal stickers, animal sounds and animal crackers were amazing.

I got to talk to my boss and be concerned.  It was a nice day and I had a good walk.

Gr8ful

 Yesterday I had a better day.  The kids were better and I had a heart to heart talk with my staff being negative named Patricia.   It was a nice day and good weather.  I had a nice run walk and later a walk.  

I am getting over the stupid of TV and earning for better shows.

I am thankful for salvation, pretty outfits and hopefully better fitting bras. 

Greatful for crazy

 Mateo and I have been able to forge a friendship.  It has been quite a challenge and yesterday everyone except Michelle and I were on crazy yesterday.  I need to talk to Patricia today.  I am glad there are only 22 days with kids and one with no kids.  

But I am grateful for good weather, a good message on Sunday, a good nights rest, a good walk yesterday, my salvation, favor with Mateo, healthy pets, the opportunity to see things as they really are. 

Gre8tful 9

 I am grateful for staff who is helpful, having stuff not go into toilets, good sermons, help at work,  Having a job, being a Saint in Christ, and new friends.

I am grateful

 I am grateful for the opportunity to do stairs at SC, say hi and have two conversations with people, walking and running 9 miles yesterday, seeing an old friend, a good nights sleep, having two amazing pets, having a library to get great books.  I am most thankful for my salvation and the fact I am not alone.

Grateful 6

 I am grateful for Mateo teaching me so many lessons.  First not getting his medicine is not my problem.  I am finding ways to relate to him.  I am starting to make the decisions to calm him down and is successful.  I am starting to relate to him.  

I am grateful for opportunities to run, sign the National Anthem and a new opportunity this next school year with less stress.

I am thankful for good sleep, good health and peace

This could not be possible without the Lord

Gre11ful 5

 I am thankful for orders delivered early, beautiful food, salvation, laps secretive, cheap CPR recert, having people do good ideas,  prayer group, parents, a husband and wonderful pets. 

Gre8ful 8 4

 I am grateful for creative last minute ideas, a good day with Mateo, an understanding friend, salvation, bunnies, husband, a nice day to walk, the ability to walk and then it started raining, losing weight, nicer days, prayer group and parents

Gra8teful 3

 

I am grateful for the little surprises along the way such as finding things quickly or without reason, my salvation, new opportunities, losing weight, good weather, lessons learned,  new books to enrich my life, a good childrens pastor and not being gassy today. 

Surprise

It was quite the end of the week.  I found out I am going to be a floater sub teacher.  It is good news mostly but definitely a change for me.  

Compliments and Witness

 I am so thankful that I got some compliments and I got to be a witness.  God gets all of the glory.

Tale of the stupid Toy Story toy

 Yesterday was really rotten.  I was prepared but I was sad that I am not singing for the graduation.  I understand why because we don't want to ruffle feathers but it still stinks. Then I got to the room and found out the toy was supposed to stay at school.  I apparently was not notified about this.   I went home and Mike was not supportive.  Then my aide began to just leash out stuff.  Then we had a meeting and had to present.  Naturally all the pressure of presenting and finding stuff out of my butt was on me as well as anything that was disagreed.  I know Lord you told me how I acted would be a witness.  And I know stuff is going on in others lives but I will be kind but quiet today.  

I am grateful for my walk yesterday, a good Bible study, getting my Hobby Lobby card for mom, getting some good food, I presented well and the knowledge that there are reasons for stuff and that the SLP did the folders which she should of been doing all year long. 

I also left before anyone else.  I hope I don't get in trouble for that.  Today is a new day.  I can't worry about what others think of me is that I am God's child

Gre8tful 2

 Hugs from hubby

Great prayer group

Christian friend at work

New clothes

Taxes were paid

Rabbits who love 

Faster walk

Help at work

Kids who talk

Gre8tful 1

 I am grateful for the relationship I have with Christ, my music in my head, my family, my day off,  a good job,  finishing my book, and a good nights rest. 

Don 't anticipate the worst

 Today I had several situations where I could of assumed the worst.  First my boss called.  It was a mistake but naturally I assumed the worst.  Then I had several emails from my job.  Again what did I do wrong.  Nope just regular stuff.  Last I thought where was the place for checking the cool.  It came an hour late.  Glad I did not assume and call. 

I did have a good Sunday.  I felt as though my songs went well, I got to minister to some kids and the show at Trinity was great.  I really liked Rend Collective.  They were really good and shared a lot of good stuff..  

Good Stuff

 I had a nice time at SC.  I left about the time it got super busy.  Church was good.  I was able to touch a lot of kids.  My music went well.  Had a decent nap.  

Confidence

 I may experience anxiety or fear but it is not my identity.  I choose to do the grateful 8.

I am grateful for good weather the next few days.  I walked and ran 6 miles.  I got some new clothes that fit

I am going to some Christian concerts this week.  I listened to  Sam Evans, Henry Cloud, Pastor's Stevens book, Joyce Meyer and Charles  Stanley with inspiring messages.   I found a flower that reminded me that God is there.  I made some new outfits and got some grate feedback on them.  I have had some good time with my bunnies and a fun field trip on Wed.  I loved the Elsabeth series.  

Being Human and asking for help

 I have been trying to pray for wisdom and help.   I see His hand on the little things and I am grateful.  

I have forced myself to slow down and see the opportunities around me.  I am more understanding.

Back to Business

 Yesterday two of our staff were out.  I think it is because Mateo scares them.  After school the SLP from 116 offered to help me.  Initially it was not what I needed to hear but I realized and accepted the help.  this morning my husband tried to pin his depression on me.  I realized it is not about me but on others.  It is hard to see that but I am thankful I am learning.  Lord help me accept what I need to do and then leave others to others

Swallow Cliff

 Yesterday I went to SC late.  I was depressed and the sun and warmer temps really helped.  I am thankful for this break.  I got to connect with my peeps and see that I live a quality life.  

Saying No

 I have been doing a lot of thinking this week.  I am prioritzing my life a lot.  Today I had to say no to a friend who needs to be out of my life.  It is hard but I am pacing the race, singing the National Anthem so I need to stay focused on my whys for this race.  

I am also looking at my life and reprioritzing it a lot.  What is the most important.  I am learning about what is the best and which good to avoid. 

Thankful for my time with my family yesterday.  I am blessed

Thankful

 I am thankful for yesterday.  It was a good day.  I went to Elevation and had anice time.  Pastor Holly did the sermon.  My husband and I watched it together.  Sometimes the smallest things are the best.

Our water pressure was low.  I thanked the city officials for their help.  

God Knows

 Yesterday could of been a disaster but we had one of the best subs.  Towanda.  She is like 2 people as far as I am concerned.  Mateo had his moments but it was okay.  I also had a last minute visitor and two of my staff were gone but I felt this peace.  I am so thankful for God's peace.  

Tonight is our sedor dinner.  I frankly don't want to go but Mike does so we go.  I pray that the Lord will help me be a blessing.  

Ocean Drums, A Runner , IEPs

 Today we had ocean drums in music therapy, I did not hit a runner on the way home from the gym and looks like I can print my IEPs tomorrow.  Better day

Collinder, Bull in China Shop

Wasted Time

 I have been made aware of the wasted time I have been doing lately.  I watch TV and usually something dumb.  I shop once a week at this junk store and all they have is broken junk.  I need to assess what I do and see what is a waste of time and what is good.

That even happened today when in my classroom we were dealing with a crisis situation.  I made the decision to be a part of the conversation but not engage.  I can't let the high of anger consume me.  

I even was able to filter what was good and what was bad.  

I am thankful for the mistakes of yesterday that help me do the better decisions of today.

What can I control?

 First of all I can control that my life is in the control of Jesus.  I can control how I remember that I will get the testing done in the Lord's time.  I can not worry about dumb things like spring cleaning.  I can not control other people's foolishness but I can control how I handle it.  I can ask and say statements but I can't argue with a fool.    I can be proud that I am handling things the best I can. 

Positives of Today

 I had two good conversations today.  One was I am having my people at church.  It was nice having Ivan and Brelle sitting with me.  Also my questions went well for the review.   I even got to have two adult conversations at church.  One was with the music minister and the other was with a seasoned saint.  She actually missed me in adult service.  Nice thoughts.

Basic Problems

 I was on the treadmill and it finally hit me what two things I need to work on.  First of all I am over the comparison of myself and other people whether it is fair or affects me.

The other thing is to keep doing what is supposed to be done and not try to go from thing to thing.

Lessons learned

Bunnies and Blessings

 Yesterday we got our eighth bunny yesterday named Sparkles.  She is already becoming a Chapan and very interactive with all of us.  Also my kids were able to go outside yesterday!

DLM, Testing and Evals

 Well I started the DLM testing.  Also I got my eval.  It was better than expected and I figured out real quick it did not matter if I disagreed on anything.  Just going to work on it for next year.  Then I went into the room and I felt like I was getting things thrown at me.  I am so ready for Spring Break and thankful I made it through more hurdles.  

Eval

 I got the tentative results from my eval and it was kind of depressing.  A lot of it was not valid.  But I am going to use it for my good.  I am so blessed to be stressed

Running outside

 Mom,

Yesterday was a good day.  I got to walk and run with Tyler around the track twice.   I found out that the payment I thought was a scam was actually the loan from Apple Chevy so I paid the monthly fee for my extended plan for my car.  I also got in a short walk during my lunch break.

Today Elim is coming to observe Tommy.  It will be interesting to see if it is someone I know.

Also Mike had a nice time at the game.  They lost but he had a good time.  

Well off to school. 

Love,

Chris

Busy

 We had a good service at Elevation.  There was a lot to unpack with the sermon and I was glad I took notes.  It was the story of Jeremiah stuck in the cistern and the eunich that told the king and he was rescued.  

Then we were accepted for a one year old bunny named Sparkles.  We are going a Google Meets and see Sparkle for ourselves.  She is neutered, check out, etc.  So Faith might have a friend sometime this week.  She enjoyed snuggles with me during my pre nap on the couch.  

Well this week is busy with possibly adopting, a few phone calls I need to receive  this week and a visit from Elim on Tuesday.  Wednesday we start testing with the alternate testing.  Glad I have done it at least six times previously so it will be one thing that is not new.  Tomorrow I will get my SLP to handle all of the morning instruction for the next week.  Glad I am getting this final hurdle done for the year. 

My next project is to make graduation posters for my grads.  I found some window clings that were pretty cheap and I put together a layout of each poster.  The center of the poster will be the child with six pictures that will either feature something we did during the year or some of their favorites. The window clings will be laid out all around. My artsy teachers in the room will definitely have input.  It is nice that I have that program on my phone for pictures.  I have some gold silver frames so that should work.  Since it is not due till May maybe I can throw some ideas on you during my last week in March.

Life is an Adventure

 

Mike is doing okay.  I had to stop by the police station to find out some fake bills I was receiving.  I talked with the officer and he was super nice and helpful.  We checked the bank, the credit bureaus and nothing so that is good.  I will just keep an eye out on stuff.  I also contacted the  local rescue for bunnies and Mike contacted the last place.  Last I found out I have stand by jury duty but it is in Markham which is super close.  Hoping if I don’t get on the regular one will be in Markham and they only do robberies etc.  So even though I don’t want to be on a jury I am glad it might be a day off school even though teacher planning is a pain.  

Off to see the Moores.  Turned in a bit of my Amazon stuff and it was super quick.  Then it got busy . ..  Glad I went when I did.  Also do you want for Mother’s Day a Bath and Body gift card or Hobby Lobby.  They are super close to me.  Went in to BB and bought nothing. 

Love,

Chris

Out of MY Control

 I was talking to my mom and she was sharing things that were out of her control.  I reflected how this has been a area I have been working on.

, 

I can't control Pastor Adrien, Mateo, my teachers and definitely not my husband but I can let it be given to God. 

Thank you for helping me be peaceful in a non peaceful situation yesterday

today

 It was a good day.  Mateo was pretty good.  The staff seemed pretty good.  I got a lot of stuff done.  So thankful 

Surprise Good Day

 It all started with the little girl I have waved at all year waved back as I was driving to school.  Then the day was pleasant with two subs and they did a really great job.  

My kids were tolerable and my hyper one was gone.  

Reflection

 Today I went to Swallow Cliff.  This was super significant.  I had not been there since Dec. 2022.  I signed up for a stair event.  I did pretty good until I had a bathroom emergency at 12.  But I am happy.  It is only 15 for the event.  Note to self go when you start to feel the urge and not drink so much water.  

Keeping my cool

 I found out my one staff is sending her son to Egypt.  It is sad but he is such a handful maybe some reality in another country will be good.  My SLP is sad because it is her child and I think she feels like a failture.  She has also been angry a lot and it is even towards me.  I feel so torn because it is an impossible job to keep everyone happy and my job is to keep everyone safe.  

But God is helping me.  I feel peace that this impossible situation with my difficult rascal will result in three scenerios.  The staff that can't handle it will be gone, God will give me the strength as needed, I will learn a lot in this situation or the student will be removed.

Also yesterday my bunny was sick.  Not sure what happened but the Lord directed me to play I am the God that healeth thee.  I  totally saw a miracle and suddenly she was well.  

Last we had our taxes done.  My husband did not bother to do the money thing.  So I am doing it on Tuesday so we can avoid the high tax bill.  It is not fun but it will be resolved.  But instead of freaking out I am calm.  

Highs and Opportunities

 Yesterday we went to the trampoline park.  I was quite busy with Tommy.  He was all over the place until he fatigued.  I even pushed him a few times.  Then a little girl named Lily crawled into my lap and just loved on me for about half an hour.  It was amazing and such a blessing for us both.

Mateo was also out of sorts.  He was crazy after I returned from lunch.  I am not totally sure but the afternoon was wild with my staff just paralized in fear.  I kept the teaching train going. 

Then the Lord told me I was supposed to bring joy to my staff.  But under His power.  

I am praying for that today.  Last Gracie is sick.  I am not sure what happened but today she is not eating.  I trust the Lord things will work out.

I can't control dumb people

 Today was tough.  Mateo was all whacked out for his behavior.  Nadia was mad at me because I allowed Mateo do touch the Smartboard because I was by myself.  And TOmmy mom mad at me because I can't control her foolishness and the bus getting him there late.

I had a good day with making the schedule for the field trip.  Preparing for it and Doing a social story for M.  

I also had an engaging lesson.  It totally flopped but I will redo it on Friday.  

I am thankful for...

 I really enjoyed my night at Elevation Nights.  It was so fun and worshipful.  I love the humble heart of all of the pastors.  

Yesterday was nice not going in.  I did feel bad because my SLP ended up with the bulk of the work.  

I  am thankful for a husband that likes the same music as I do, my family, my pets, my job and a closer work.

I am thankful for my car and your wisdom Lord. 

Justice

 It had been seeming lately that I was getting blamed for other peoples mistakes.  Yesterday things happened so I was able to show that I know what I am doing and just with the help of the Lord did it.  I am seeing that I may not have the answers but I have the help of the Lord and the knowledge from past mistakes and victories to prepare me for the present adventure.

New challenges await me Tuesday but honestly I am glad for the break.  

Growth through Mistakes

 Yesterday my BL really struggled.  It was first Life Class where the SLP did not prepare him for the next activity.  Then in gym the SLP was out of control with her anger.  Then my aide came in and I thought we were supposed to go outside.  It is hard when you try to do the right thing and everyone else is protecting their butts.  But I am proud of myself that I was able to figure out stuff to help yesterday.  I am proud of myself I was able to keep my cool when everyone else was freaking out.  I hate it when I get blamed for others mistakes.  I am trying so hard to do things right.  I give it to you Lord.  Help me make your decisions and accept that I don't have to live in anger stuffed but in your peace.    I am called to be at MGW.  I am only expected to do the best I can.  Help me Lord know how to handle this situation better. 

Good Day

 It was a good day.  Mateo  was as good as he could be.  We had a good day.  I was able to make fix a mess and I was able to figure out something.   

I am super tired but thankful for a good day.  I was so tired today mid day.

Back to Business

It was a good weekend.  Kids church was fun and I had a good weekend with Mike and the rents.  Tomorrow I make the plans for next Monday and my eval.  It will go well.  God is with me. 

Not popular

 Today I kept things pretty well with the schedule.  It is hard when it seems like other people are against you but it was okay.  I am thankful for God's peace and trying to establish a relationship with a rascal. 

Humility and Worry

 What we do when we worry is that we allow Satan to steal our minds and hearts.  I had a situation like that yesterday.  I chose to be humble and ask God for help and not myself when I don't know what to do.  Also I forgot to mention some things that happened yesterday we special moments from the Lord.

First when Mateo had a hard time when I went back in the room he hugged me.  Then Tommy lovingly touched my chin.  We got out early yesterday and I got my bangs cut.  Despite the long wait I was able to get in and out fast because I had checked in before the rush. I was able to minister to a special needs adult and then a kid getting his first hair cut.  The Lord gave me the words to say to him and he went from fearful and crabby to excited about his new adventure of being brave.  I am not perfect but I need to stop relying on myself and trusting the Lord. 

I was praying about our trip.  I don't think we should go to South Carolina.  How about Minnesota to see Faith and Gary and then the school where dad graduated and maybe North Central?  My friend went to Minneapolis recently and found some inexpensive off the beaten path activities.  Another possibility might be Grand Canyon.  I would not mind if Dad comes along. 

Running the Room

 I am learning to not take things personally.  Yesterday I blew it when my one staff did not have things go her way.  It was not fun and she caused crazy in the whole classroom.  I am going to stop wanting her approval and just do the best I can with the circumstances.  

Today

 Overall it was a good day.  Mateo was good for him and we got visited from Easter Seals for Tommy and that went okay.  At noon today I ate lunch and Pastor Steven and Holly were promoting his book online.  It was neat knowing that there were people all over the world in the meeting.  Even though I am still doing ministry in kids church I am so thankful for the ministry at Elevation Church.  It is so nice to be a part of a stable church ministry.  

I  hope your lunch with Rich went well, your dentist appointment ( no cavities) and you were a encouraging ding a long in bells.

I am super excited about tomorrow.  I am rolling out the task boxes and using my  Valentine special activities to get the staff ready to do task boxes with the students.  I think if the kids are on board the staff will be too. 

Have a pleasant evening!

Love,

Chris

Justice Served

It was a busy day for me.  I started using the Power Points guides with the lessons and that made everything more efficient and easy for me.  I had my student Jaylen do some things that he had not done before like say words clearly, make choices on a new game quickly and did a job without me telling him exactly what to do.  Mateo did three activities for me and I started on getting the kids to do task boxes that will help them with their goals.  My meeting went well and I have decided to maybe send a short email instead of meeting and then if they have any questions they can talk to me personally.  It will also give a paper trail of my expectations for my staff.  

My day went well and I tried a new social story with Mateo about taking turns.  It went better in the sensory room.  My only hiccop was when the two Occupational Therapists came in to work with him and were unorganized, disrupted my room, and Mateo was hitting one of my staff and them.  Last week they were complaining about me to my boss so it was justice for me.  I will pray for them and hope I can find a common ground.  But it showed me that what people try to do against others comes back to them.

Well I am off to watch Elevation and take proper notes for Wednesdays Bible Study.  I love you!

Chris

The Reason Why

 Tomorrow I get to let my staff know what I truly believe is God's will for our class.  I am realizing that is not me but what is best for kids. 

So many fun things in class.  The kids are more repectful.  We had 60 kids. The games were fun and then I got lots of samples for my class and bunt cakes for my teachers.  Woo Hoo!

My Joy is My Job

As I reflect on my week I still have those pieces of people pleasing come in.  I am learning that I can't please everyone and that my joy on the things that went right last week are my job.  I need to keep students safe and frankly that I know what I am doing in my job.  

It has been a good week.  My lessons went well.  I kept myself better eating wise and I reached out to others. 

All I have ever be

 Yesterday was a busy day. I did a step by step lesson on making an art project.  We read it in reading and then did it on the Smartboard later in the day.  I finished up some lessons for next week and got to enjoy going outside.  It has been quite the week so I am looking forward to a mellow weekend.  I did a lot of the weekly cleaning yesterday morning so that will be a treat for me to just relax.  

I tried to call my friend  who is at home on hospice but I tried three of the numbers and none of them worked.  So I am going to share a short note and send it to her.  I am so glad my friend Marlene knows the Lord no matter what happens these few days.

Last I finally got to pray with Joy Thursday.  It was really nice to talk with her.

Today is a gym day and then a long nap.  Yesterday due to a series of mistakes not my own Mateo had another tough day.  Also a mistake was made not by me but a few years ago on a child's IEP.  But I am proud of myself.  Last year Tommy had 50 write ups and this year only 6.  Jesus is allowing me to connect with him.  

Please pray as I have my meeting with my staff on Monday.  Sometimes people just want to be lazy.  Even though I am an extremely flexible person with all that happens in a day and can pick up where others have sudden emergencies I need to have them follow the schedule exactly.  

The Lord is convicting me to be excellent and even though other people do things they are not supposed to I need to be above reproach.  

Last I think Pastor Michael is having a special V Day tomorrow.  I am in charge of one game which is good.  I can't wait to see Mather and Marshall.  They bring joy to my life.   Love you!  Chris

A Lesson Plan, Mateo, and Power Points

 It was quite the day yesterday.  First of all my cooking lesson went well despite Mateo's outbursts.  Then we had the lesson and again things went well.  My boss observed the later part of the lesson but it was still good.  Then came gym and Mateo really freaked out with the gym teacher. He continued to spiral for the next hour. My boss was amazing. She helped a lot.   For the rest of the year we are going to have to have a teacher in every lesson.  It is crazy but it will need to happen. I also made power points for our lessons and continued to make all the lessons live. Thank you Lord for helping me.

Calm Down Chris!

 

Mom,

I truly believe that God calls us to a higher standard than most.  I met with her and she wants me to stick to Coop Curriculum.  I am super okay with that.  I will just try to follow what others are doing and make sure all the activities I do have a standard for that grade level.  I also decided to take a few weeks off WBT and let them know I have a commitment on Thursday.  It is just I need to relax when I get home and regroup from a busy and productive day teaching curriculum.

I went to Music Therapy yesterday and the teacher commented that she wished I could be a part of all her classes.  That was huge and she commented several times that I had such a lovely voice.  Thank you Lord for letting me know that He still appreciates my gift.  I will talk to Nadia and see if I can do a plan earlier on Friday so I can be a part of music in the future.

Well today is the eval.  I am not discouraged.  I am looking at this as an opportunity to grow.  I found out that my staff has not talked to her but a few of the other teachers who deal with my kids.  I will just play nice and be careful like I usually do. It is just payback for when I had to rat on them for not doing their work I am responsible for. 

Mateo was upset at me yesterday and I took my glasses off so he would not hurt them.  Interesting he stopped being upset for a moment.  I think I will try that next time and put them in my desk.  I am also bringing a spare pair to school and see if that helps extinguish his anger.  

When I was little I thought about being a detective.  The way the kids respond, how they learn, and manage their emotions I get to do that everyday.

Last night we watched the Monopoly History Movie Under the Boardwalk.  I think of all the times we played it and that Grandma Rosie had me play it because she wanted to make sure I could use money properly.  I think she was usually the thimble piece. 

Positive in a Negative World

 Today I felt like I made some connections.  First of all I made some with Mateo.  He shared with me his Lego animals and even danced with me.

Our talk with Nyia went well but mostly it is just crap.  But we did it.

I made it through Tyler's meeting  went well.

I was able to express my overwhelmingness.

My choice board is going well.   The spinning wheel is okay.

Task boxes are making an opening. 

I am getting over making iditots happy.  

Mistakes are how we grow

 Today was a terrible day but a learning day.  I learned about how I need to present my sub plans better.  I need to make sure my staff is always working.  I need to do different formats for the sub plan.  Everyone is out for themselves.  I can take constructive feedback and use it for my own good.  Despite the challenges of today I learned a lot. 

Busy Week

 Yesterday I got to serve for our 18th anniversary.  It was really fun.  This time I made connections with people and the service was great.  Pastor Steven talked about the left handed warrior Ehud.  It was awesome.  Sometimes I feel like that hidden person but God is preparing me for the next big thing.

Tomorrow is my last students' IEP and then Thursday is my second evaluation.  It is always nervy but I am glad to get it over with. 

Still have the cold but it is better.  Off to busy Monday but I don't walk alone.  Thank you Lord. 

Quiet Day

 We had a quiet day.  I stayed home and had a long nap.  I also did some cleaning and we are making chicken dumplings and rah men.  Tomorrow is church and then a long nap.  I am glad I skipped.  I still enjoy working out but being out for two and a half hours is not my cup of tea anymore

Permission to fail, disappoint, not act immediately, be imperfect and not get credit

 Yesterday I found out from my boss what i needed to work on.  That is good.  Then I made sure my IEP was ready for Tyler.  The people who were supposed to submit stuff had not.  Initially it made me look bad but fortunately I had done two previously reminders to do it on time.

Then last night the whole brain meeting.  I seem like I never get any recognition.  I need to wake up and see the girl inside does not have to be recongnized.  Maybe that is why church has disappointed me.

Trying something new today to be more structured.  Hope it helps. 

Blessings

 Today was a mixed bag but I am thankful through trial and error and mistakes I can be a better teacher.  Second I have had some songs that touched my heart this week.  It is neat when the Lord does that.

100s Day

 It was a good day yesterday.  We learned about how to structure teaching for kids.  I already do a bit of that but I am thinking about praying how I will impliment it more.  

Today is 100s day and lots of fun activities but keeping structured with the whole day.  

Need some prayer for some wisdom on stuff.  I am glad decisions don't have to be made right away. 

Yesterday

 Yesterday we had Tommy's Transitional Meeting.  Parents were not happy with choice.  They want private school.  They want afterschool care.  They just don't want to parent.  And the big problem is that they put it on my boss.  I felt so bad.  I prayed so much .  I am praying about how to lift my boss.  Not for my praise but the Lord's .  Show me.

My lessons as a whole went better.  I think the stuff I am putting together is good.  

I made the mistake yesterday watching a video of my former class by the teacher.  Not much has changed academically but they were all sitting on the carpet so nice.  I feel so bad.  But the Lord told me I should not watch it.

Well today i am off to a learning opportunity to work on task boxes.  I have been down that road at least four times before.  I will pray as it goes on that I will make them and be successful.  Frankly I am thankful for not being at school and leaving good lesson plans for the SLP.

I did not handle afterwards so well.  I was asked about it and I was too negative even though there were nothing to be positive about it. So sad it makes me cry for my student and my boss.  I am glad you are in control Lord. 

Feeling a bit better and still pretty tired.  I hate not being able to run.  I hate being sick.  

I am grateful for a husband who loves me, my parents who care, Mather's surgery went well, a good day at work.  I am blessed. 

Everything takes longer with medication

 I am learning that when I am sick or stressed I need to sit back and pray about decisions.  Not jump.  I know Lord that you had yesterday in control despite my stupidness.  I was able to function and Mondays are the hardest part of the week.  

I need to give anything I had a concern about today to the Lord.  Even small stuff and not react fast. 

Glad tomorrow is just a meeting.  I look forward to just sitting quiet. 

Doctor Visit

 Well I did not have the flu and Covid and I did not have a temp.  They say it is viral.  I am getting an inhaler, Flonaise and told I need to lose some weight, eat less salt, less sugar .  My BP is on hypertension.  

I am not sure about what will happen tomorrow.  I feel so incredibly stupid.  I forgot probabaly the most important thing.

I see where in the past I blew it and I did not listen.  

I am also wondering what I should do about Elevation.  I am working at forgiveness at Stone and maybe saying Goodbye to Elevation on Sundays.  

Pastor Steven had a good message.  I need to remember that God is bigger than me and what I can't do He can do.  I am learning to wait and not make decisions on spot.  

Well tomorrow is another day.  I will 

Today

Lots of cleaning and relaxing today.  Even finished my Pastor Furtick book and review.  Did a lot of praying 

Sick Day

 I am sick.  It is my own fault with handwashing, eating too much sugar etc.  Yesterday I posted some pictures of my students and my boss found out.  Why do I do dumb things.  I just hope I have a job.

I guess sometimes I am still this little girl who wants to be noticed.  It hurts that it seems like I am not noticed so much.  But it does not give an excuse to do dumb things.  

I guess when I have some spare time I need to ask the Lord what I need to do. How should I handle church, Elevation, etc.  

I sometimes look at others and wish I could do what they do but I know I have been called to a higher purpose.  

I give my wishes and desires to you.  No I will not be on the fast track to tenure in two years.  But I can do my best and try for four.

Fun Day

 It was a fun day without Mateo.  We had a good day with doing a snowballs .    Then we did a science experiment where we watched the marshmellows get bigger.  

Good Things

 Had a good Bible study today and I was suprrised with chilli at lunch.  I got something done that was super hard.  

A Clear Head

 Today started off kind of dicey.  I made some decisions that I tried to explain but it fell on deaf ears.  I know I made the right decision despite others made me feel about it.

I found out one of the people I used to hang with is sick.  I initally was ticked that no one knew about it.  After going though sickness last year I am particually sensistive to it. 

But I am looking at this as an opportunity that maybe someday God will provide a way I can help in this area.

I can't change others but I can modify myself.  

A Learning Day

 Mateo was extra active today.  I think partially because he was home and also other things I can't control.  The aide and SLP made some decisions without my input.  I felt bad for my friend.  She tries so hard.  I feel like they are just mean to her.  But then they started to turn the tables and blame me for stuff.  I remember that they are not perfect either and I stated I had a lot to learn but I was absoutely doing the best I can.  And for the first time in my 56 years I really don't care if anyone is talking about me or that I don't have it all together.  It is better than I have done in the past and I felt the confidence of the Lord I was doing the best I can.

I found out today my movie I had been waiting for came in and I was able to watch it.  Not as good as I remembered it.  I also found out that the fitness membership was not as expensive as I thinking it would be.  

I got home and Mike was in one of his moods.  I am realizing there are so many things I can control and others I can't

I also found out my friend was in the hospital.  After being there myself a year ago I really feel for them.  The sad thing is no one at church seemed to noticed.  Another reason I am glad that at least part time I am where I am.

Well prayer for tomorrow and we will see what happens. 

Positivity 101

 Today I faced some challenges from losing things, to someone practicing for Sunday as he knows my hurt not being on team.  I also had the opportunity to work on my iep.  So much work.  I am learning.  Got to watch a doc on Carol Spinney or Big Bird.  I also got to watch something on Michael English.  Good stuff. 

Nice Surprises Today

 I had some nice surprises today.  First of all I got to witness to my friend Steve and tell him all God is doing.  He also shared.  Then at church I was able to relate to several kids.  Then I went to my friends wife's wake and I ran into some old running buds.  It was nice to have some surprises today. 

I still need to pray about how to do life with my husband.  I know I need to take more time in doing things but I also get frustrated when he makes me do it all.  

Don't forget the positive things

Yesterday there was a lot to be thankful for.  When I got home last night my neighbor had done some shoveling.  That was great.  I had more time in my planning yesterday working on something I had messed up.  My new Hungryroot order came.  I made a good meal.  I got to do some fun things yesterday in my classroom.    It was a good day! 

Doing the right thing can be messy

 Yesterday I had to rat out one of my aides.  She is new and pushing the buttons to do her college at work and the courses we were supposed to do on our day off.  Initally I felt bad when I got an email about telling my boss on the walkie or text.  But then my boss stepped in and get her in trouble. 

I really tried to do my IEP correctly so I had someone come in and help me.  It was hard but I prayed for a good attitude.  I am glad I did.

I was able to control Mateo's behaviors better today.  He is so naughty. All I can do is try.

Tommy did not bring home his jacket and I let the mom know right away..  She sent me a bunch of emails.  That is so stressful yet she can do what she wants.  Four months can't come soon enough.

I feel asleep after 6:30,  I was so tired.  But today is a new day.  Ready for new challenges.

Listened to Pastor's after message.  It was really good.  I enjoyed it so much.  I know after I listen to it again I will get more stuff to focus on.

I did not get picked for something recently.  I honestly don't have the time to do it.  sad as it is I am glad I was not chosen.

Control and Manipulation

 I am learning about how people use manipulation and control to get what they want.  Sometimes they even use other peoples words and twist them. Also sometimes you use stupid to get what you want.  I want to be that person that says what I mean.

Back to Business

 Got back after a five day hiatis.  It was a challenging day and my sleep definitely was affected.  I kept positive with the wins we had done for Mateo.  I am also battling the stupid phone with my new aide and her acting like she can't do tech.  

I am blessed though for a quick mind, God's wisdom, creativity and a good Bible study.  I also made dinner and it was okay.  I was so tired yesterday but I pushed through.

Off to Tommy's meeting.  Please Lord help me to slow down and not make mistakes. 

Blessings of Yesterday

 I had a day at home with e learning and things went well.  I am learning how the parents want to work with their child and how to present more e learning differently.  

I had a exceptionally long meeting but I was able to eat my lunch and get some paperwork done.  

My hubby and I made a new pasta dish.  It was good. 

I got my medication increased with my nurse.  I am hoping it will help with the anxiety.  

Better than Before

 Yesterday was a good day.  Just some surprises like e learning today and I had to get stuff together at the last minute.  I visited Diane and we had a nice lunch.  Mike and I enjoyed some Everybody Loves Raymond. 

I am learning instead of freaking out I just need to pray and allow myself to be human.  

Despite the inconviences of today I need to remember to not forget the past and how things are better now. 

Gods will not my will

 Yesterday I got to go to Elevation.  It was a good message.  The only thing that made me feel bad was that I will never have a kid.  I guess I need to pray for what God wants.  Not what I want.

Also listened to a good message about the New year with Greg Laurie.  He is so talented and anointed.  

Mike and I also had a good time with supper.  He is such a talented cook.  I am truly blessed. 

Bitter vs. Better

 I guess it all started when I asked my pastor a few years ago to pray for me.  Some pretty intense stuff was happening.  He brushed it off.  Then later I needed some ideas for therapy so I emailed him and he did not respond but I contacted a pastor at Moody and within a day I was on my way to Christian therapy.  More recently I caught him talking about my mentors negatively and then I was in the hospital.  No contact.  No visit.  When I mentioned about my dad he stated he wished he had extensive heart surgery he could take a break like that.  The people he surrounds him I had this gut feeling that things are not good.  I am not jealous or bitter but I am beyond disappointment and so I need to do what is best for me in the meantime.  Thankful for my new job and that I go to Elevation every other week.  

Now I am looking to a new year.  I need to loose weight and change up how I work out.  I am waiting for the next step in my spiritual and social life.  

I have to decide what I can control and what I can't control.  How the pastor responds to me I can't control.  I can't control who people have friends with.  But I can control how I respond and what I put in my mouth. 

Pressing toward the future

 I finally got to go to the gym yesterday.  I had a fairly good workout and a chance to think about my goals for the coming year.  I also heard Charles Stanley do a message on meditation.  Something for me to add to my quiet time.  I started one of the books Mike got yesterday.  I am hoping that maybe we can share with what we read with each other.  Planetshakers was good and the speaker brought out some good points.  The air purifier has been good.  It helps with sleeping definitely.  Grace did some funny stuff yesterday to get my attention.

I did have some nightmares last night regarding responsibilities old job stc.  I will pray about it and decide to work on my weaknesses and focus also on my victories. `

Well now it is quiet time and some meditation.

A New Perspective

 Yesterday it snowed a lot.  Instead of getting angry that I was the shoveler I thought about how blessed I am to have the day off and be able to shovel.  I worked on one of my students ieps and I found a lot of mistakes.  Instead of being upset that I seem to not do it right I am looking at what an opportunity I have to do things right and learn from the past. Last I found out my former district did not cancel school until 9 minutes before arrival.  That was insane.  Glad I have a admin that makes the call super early. 

Inconviences can be blessings

Today we found out early that we are having a snow day.  Initially I was sad because I am ready for a virtual meeting with staff or students but then I realized that it was a blessing because first our admin made it early, and in the past the decision was made last minute with at least three to four phone calls from our admin.  

 

Next I made a mistake and my crazy parent freaked out.  My boss nicely told me that it was not good because I had made another earlier in the week.  But then I thought about the heat I used to take on stuff, get written up etc.

Yesterday as a whole was a good day.  The kids without Mateo were good and as I was coming home there was a group of geese flying south for the winter.  It was really neat to see the groups all in their v formation.

Also I spent the last of my gift card at the dollar tree.  Honestly I thought there was only 7 dollars on it but instead it was 15.  Double blessings.

Quad Blessings

 Yesterday I had a message from a parent.  I had to fill out two super long forms for a students.  Initially I complained about it but then I realized I just needed to do it.   I prayed So I did it and surprising it was done.  Then I really felt led to make a few connections with Mateo.  That was truly a miracle. I got an email from Elevation and they are giving me an advanced copy of Pastor Furtick's book.  There is a special group and more encouragement.    Last I sat last night with the husband we watched the second part of Pastor Steven's message.  How cool is that?  I may not have everyday like that but with putting my thoughts of blessing everyday i know I can.  Thank you Lord. 

A Great Example

 I worked with an incredible sub yesterday.  First of all she was super early.  Her name was Patricia and she just blended in with the rest of the team.  The kids liked her and I liked her.  It is nice to work with someone who is part of the team.  Shows me how to inspire my new aide to do the same.  

Snow.  The snow was not as bad as expected.  Little blessings and I will take them.

First Day Back

 Yesterday was one of the first days back I had.  The kids seemed happy to be back and Mateo had a good day.

I made two recipes and they both turned out good.  I did not stay within my points but I was okay with my eating.  

Thank you Lord for a good first day back

Back To Business

 I am thankful for my new job.  I look at last year and think about this year.  What a difference.

I look at kids church from last year and now this year.  Doing twice a month what a difference.

Yesterday was a good Sunday.  The kids discussion went well, the skit was good and my signing for the scripture worked really well.  Even the lesson the kids listened.  

I have new challenges this year.  First doing the goals I set out to do in my job.  Second a challenging student and staff that wants to do the bare mininum at times. Training someone new. Lord help me make the most of each day in 2024.

Choice

 This is day 2 of grattitude.  I woke up last night full of fear.  I felt like I was doing an impossible task.  I was in the midst of many people who I felt inadequate with.  I was lost.  I was overwhelmed.  I am so glad God has it all under his hands.  All I have to do is to seek him.  He has been faithful before and He will do it again.  Instead of looking at others for fear of failure I just need to look at him. 

New Year New Graditude

 I am thankful today for my many blessings.  I am thankful for my mom and dad.  I am thankful for my therapist.  I am thankful for my husband.  I am thankful for a new year and a opportunity to try new things.

I am thankful for new goals and directions.  Most of all I am thankful for my relationship with the Lord.  He is all I could ever hope for.

I am thankful

 I woke up this morning all in a panic but instead I am writing about all the ways I am grateful for my life.

I am grateful that this year is a whole year behind with my seizures, broken ankle and toxic enviroment I left last year.  I am thankful for a supportive family and loving husband.  I am in a better job and people who actually want to work.  I am thankful