As I reflect on yesterday I remember that God knew yesterday would come. He knew everything would explode and that I would be in the middle of this big mess. But it is one I can learn from and then work on making it work.
Ultimately I know that the Lord is in control of all and that it was not a surprise to him stuff happened. I am getting the people pleaser out of my system and I am walking with purpose.
Today was just plain awful. My one aide was just had it for me and my friend. Then I had to talk to a HR counselor. It was so embarrassing and I asked for help and I was made to feel like a fool. I am so thankful I am NOT going to have a classroom next year. I am determined to be honest in my dealings. I trust God that I will continue to be employed and that the Lord has his hand on me.
Please bring justice God.
I came in today and things went from bad to worse. First my paperwork that was to be done was not. Then I got cornered with everything and then there were lies and lies on me. I shared what had happened with my boss and she did a Freudian slip and told me the person in the wrong she was going to appolgize to. I also got knocked for stuff that was not my fault. Moving forward I will do summer and the the floating thing but when I get old enough I think it will be time to be done. I am done.
I am grateful for a mom who listens, a prayer group that prays, Super bunnies, a nice house to live in, that I could see my words were no use, and that there are only two days left.
Yesterday was just awful. Two of my staff were gone. The one left was mad she actually had to work. My SLP was trying to get dirt on others and I am stuck making the day as smooth as possible with people cancelng out and acting like they were in preschool.
Today I had my E group. I realized I was not alone in the things of God and how one year later my life is so much better.
Today will be hard. Staff will continue to be difficult. I will stand up for myself.
I saw some things at SC today that were pretty weird. I prayed for them . Then a police officer purposely kept the light on red on the way home so catch some red lighters. Life is pretty weird.
Calling mom after I get off work is a bad idea. I am stressed and I just need to chill with the Lord.
Worrying about how I appear to parents is dumb especially if they are not going to be seen again.
I need to prepare kids for the stations before all the hoopla comes. I need to not get upset at people doing wrong things. I can't control a husband who is having a tantrum, someone who leaves half day, or someone who does not come to work and expects me to do her job and mine.
I prayed before I reacted with one of my staff, I encouraged my staff to pray instead of complain, I ignored stupid and kept on teaching and last thought about what I would do different next time.
I kept my ear placed to small voices from the HS.
Thank you Lord for putting me in the right place at the right time.
This week has been a mix of peace, new beginnings and learning to say no. On Sunday I found out they are discontinuing the Watch Party. I think I knew it was time but as everyone else was mentioning what am I going to do I felt led to pray for the group. Also one of the guys in the group really made me feel uncomfortable. Then yesterday I was teaching and everyone was fighting or telling me what to do. It was pure chaos but I trusted the Lord and just kept on doing what I was doing and it was amazing how the Lord helped me. Last one of my staff is openly looking for another job. She used an AI to help her do her resume. I initially thought it was great but then the little warning bells came on and I realized it was a way to get information about her identify. 5 more days of stupid.
Today was graduation. It was a nice day. I am thankful for my students and that I got in a nice walk at lunch. I can't change others but I can change myself. I am also grateful for people getting what they deserved.
Today I am grateful for unanticipated surprises, new opportunities, good Bible study, good helpers, nice students, medicine and looking forward to dinner
I am grateful for today for walking, being able to be outside, I like you from Mateo, Smiling faces, almost of single digits, some hand holding from students.
Lately I have been blown away about the more than chance stuff lately. I am so blessed with everything.
I am thankful for the sermon yesterday, good food, a pretty day, seeing my family, Swallow Cliff, a good pastor, a nice job and a happy place to work at, husband and bunnies.
I am just amazed. I am in the midst of rapid change. I am in the midst of starting another job this fall. I have decided to not want to be part of the worship set with looking at old people perform and that my purpose is to minister not to be on a show. I just see God's hand in my life from the past two years. So amazing.
Yesterday I made a mistake but now I am learning to pray first and not react to others. Honestly it was not my fight to fight.
Second there was a discussion yesterday about protests. I did not know how to answer them. But I am thankful for GOTQUesstions and it answered them.
Mike was disagreeing with me on stupid things today. I am learning that many battles are not worth fighting.
I am grateful for a nice day at Swallow Cliff. A workout, a good message from Dr. Cloud, music that uplifts the soul, good time with friends yesterday.
Recently I have been reflecting on the things at work I have been doing right. I have been also discovering that the reason I was so addicted to singing and races was that it made people happy. But what makes people happy does not always be what God wants.
I am learning more and more to just lay back and trust God. Like loosing things and then quickly or at the right time they are found.
I am grateful for being able to poop, enjoy the day outside, enjoy my students and their sense of humor, a good show, sunshine, Running sleeves, ipods, saying goodbye to stuff.
Sometimes and often I encounter a bully. Today there was this dog that was barking. When I left it it was whimpering. It makes me think that first of all the dog did not learn to not bark. And it was neglected.
May I take the pets and opportunities that have been given to me and use it for the right purpose.
I had a good run walk. Still not fast but it is getting there. I am thankful for beautiful weather, God's strength and wisdom, and his blessings. Yesterday I was called Mrs. Chapan and I ordered a cake for Mother's Day. I am thankful for good endings and new beginnings. I confronted my aide and earlier in the week a teacher in the class. I made decisions without making people happy.
I am blown away with the wisdom of God. Mateo had a tough day and we figured out animal stickers, animal sounds and animal crackers were amazing.
I got to talk to my boss and be concerned. It was a nice day and I had a good walk.
Yesterday I had a better day. The kids were better and I had a heart to heart talk with my staff being negative named Patricia. It was a nice day and good weather. I had a nice run walk and later a walk.
I am getting over the stupid of TV and earning for better shows.
I am thankful for salvation, pretty outfits and hopefully better fitting bras.
