How God Sees Us

 I wonder sometimes why stuff happens when it is but God sees us as we are.  Yesterday morning I got my hair cut.  I mean really cut.  I had decided on two inches on the back.  The person who waited on me I was not so sure because she was older.  But then as she worked she was super detailed and careful.   I am learning to not look on the outside but look in the inside.

Its not fair and how long

 I have been struggling with some it is not fair moments.  First of all my husband got a birthday present from my inlaws.  At Christmas I really got jipped out of some gifts.  I never based my gifts of my parents but it is so obvious that stuff is so important to my inlaws I feel jipped.  I even said cash instead of junk or things I don't want.  But they still do it.  I took all my gifts from them at Christmas and I just put them in the Goodwill bin.  But then the hubs gets a gift card.  I will probably use the majority of it because I am the one who goes to Starbucks but it still hurts.

I used to be part of a teaching community.  For the last year or so it has been pretty much nothing but stress.  I quit going to the meetings and basically I was soon forgotten.  The majority of the group leveled up to new positions and I stayed where I was at.  A few years ago I stressed myself out like they are doing to no avail.  I still believe in the method but I am glad I not facing that weekly stress in my life.

I watch in so many situations in my life where I have been the constant and I am forgotten.  I wanted to be on worship team but instead they pick people who want to perform.

I quit my volunteer gig as a pacer.  Only one person mentioned anything.  I am glad for not having the stress but sad that it seemed like no one noticed.

My classes at the park district even seem like they are falling flat like a pancake but no shows and lack of interest. 

I did not even try the Bible study at my church because I feel so much like an outsider.  

How long God.  How long?

Click Bait

 Yesterday I was approached at my yoga class and told they wanted changes.  I can do that but I hesitated to ask the Lord how to do it.   She also told me I would probably die in less than 10 years because i could not balance a tree on my leg and that the internet had told her that.  

Today i got an email from my new boss and she welcomed me HOME.  Also my current aide I am working with was super encouraging.   I need to focus on filling and not emptying  

I also prayed about how to handle a rascal.  So much different today than yesterday.

I can't fall for Click Bait from others who disapprove.  I need to go to realiable sources such as my new boss and my aide to let me know how I am really doing.

I looked at yesterday's situation and realized I needed to talk less but the book I should of kept.  I can't make people happy all the time.

Peace to Let Past Go

 This would of been the second week of marathon training.  It was hard last week to see all the pictures but frankly I am glad I am not coaching for the marathon.  Then this would of been the first week of my SSSRA fitness class.  I frankly feel peace.  So nice to not have all the responsibilities.  

I have time to do the really important things.  Like be a witness to a formally grumpy neighbor. 

What a Difference a Week Makes

 

I was really dreading teaching summer school.  I had this challenging class and really my boss.  And then I did not want to disappoint my current boss.  

But this week has been really good.  I have been able to teach and I work with a nice teacher.  We have had our challenges with the grades, the lesson plans but it all worked out for good. 

God's Hand

 Yesterday I taught class outside and it was super hot and windy.  I thought I had informed the students that there was going to be class but only one person for one class showed up.  I was glad because it was pretty unbearable.

Then I got home and discovered at the last minute that they had just posted report cards.  Usually something like this puts me in a tizzy.  But I prayed and kept my mind clear and the process was very quick. 

What you could call a compliant that people did not get their stuff together ended up being a blessing in disguise. 

Having a Break

 This week I was really nervous about teaching.  It had been such a terrible year and I did not want to disappoint my new boss.  Today they took out the worst behaved kid and a terrible para.  The old me would of been embarrassed but I thought who cares.  I need a break.  Thanks Lord for the peace after the storm.  I am a good teacher. 

The girl screamed out with the other teacher.  Habits need to be broken and I am glad it was not me.

I got my results and Mike did from a recent test and I am glad they are normal. 

Full Circle

 I mentioned last week about my situation where a bunch of stuff fell and no one would help me.  Fast forward to this week and I watched the same thing happen to someone else.  I was able to help them and because I was not involved in the move personally was able to put the items in such a way they would not fall.  Accident I think not.

Yesterday I went into my old school and I had to move.  But as I  think about the whole situation I got the better end of the deal.  I got a newer smartboard, nicer chairs and desks and got my things working pretty fast.  Not a chance?  I know not so.  

Thank you Lord for teaching me stuff at just the right time. 

Highs and Lows

 It was super fast today when I came into school.  The kids in my yoga class had fun.  I can't let the little irrants get to me. 

Record time

 

I have finished what I could in record time.  That is awesome because I even had to move rooms.  I listened to my boss letting one of the other teachers take her old spot back.  I am just thankful there is a Smartboard.  My next door neighbord asked about my stuff, how to arrange desks and tried to take my Smartboard.  I paid too much for my junk.  Not moving or giving my stuff away.  I am seeing a high level of selfishness. 

Confusing yet Content

 

This is such a wierd time.  I brought over my stuff to my new school.  I was welcomed.  I went back to the old school.  It was empty and no goodbyes.  Then I had a plan to set up my room.  At the last minute it is changed.  

Yesterday was a wedding.  Had not been to one in so long.  I ended up sitting at the top dog table.   Then today I watched worship.  No life.  

Then I call my parents and my dad is telling me I should only go to adult church.  

My husband is upset because he is having to do more than normal stuff at work. 

I feel so torn about the summer doing summer school.  I want to leave my old position so much.  I don't want to mess up my job.

There is a time to enjoy life in the midst of crazy.  

Two Places

 It was the last day at my current school year at the awful school.  I had a few things fall and I watched two times how the persons did not bother to get out of their vehicle to help.  In fact the one was more upset than I was when stuff went all over.  

Now my old school I used to teach at.  Everyone was helping with doors, kind words of welcome and smiles.  Not one person except the one I went to say goodbye to told me goodbye.  Such a fitting ending to a crazy year.