Scary Things to Brave

 It has been quite a week.  I went to a wake I was nervous about going to.  It was my boss.  Then today a new gyno.  Answers to my questions.  A possibility that I might be able to eventually enjoy sex.  A way I could avoid being in pain during an exam.  I am grateful.  I remember that if I was able to go through theses things I can do others.  Thanks Lord!

that explains a lot

Yesterday I  did lunch with Diane.  It is a blessing and I am glad I can do it.  Had a good walk today.  

Last week I was thinking about the certified meeting.  It was interesting because my co teacher came in all swearing and mad.  It explains why she does what she does. 

The war is over for a while, let them with stuff

 Mike and I had a nice anniversary dinner.  It was nice I enjoyed it and we had good conversation and food.  Yesterday the kids church was pretty good.  The kids enjoyed going in the inflatables.  The only frustration was that the pastor went over 45 minutes after he was supposed to stop.  It was hard watching the kids just sit there with their gifts.  And then putting on the inflatables again.  I cleaned mostly up and then left.  I was so angry.  We had so many kids and the pastor did not think of anything else except that he had a large crowd.  Of course it was large because the kids were getting free gifts.  And then we got stuck with the other church's traffic.  And the people in front were scared to go.  I was finally a bad Christian and honked.  I put up my hood so the person did not know who I was.  

I think back to the book Let them.  I let Adren preach too long.  I cannot control him but I can sure control that I am in kids church and not in the service.  Plus I know this is where I am supposed to be to minister to the future of the flock.  I can't change others but I can change myself. 

I can't change others with their behavior like at work but I can do things God's way  I choose to do that.

A Special Morning

 Today I got to spend most of the morning with one of rascals.  He worked hard for me and then we baked cookies.  He did so incredible.  Thank you Lord for giving me wisdom today.  I also got a letter about my fake religious statement.  What a time to send it right before break.  I have tried hard to not show my faith but it is pretty hard when God is shining in me.  

Every challenge is a growth opportunity

 Yesterday was quite the morning.  From not answering a parent's email, to meeting with my boss, to  a staff who smelled of weed it was quite the morning.  But it all worked out.  Thankful for that.  

Make a choice to enjoy your life

 

I really need wisdom.  I made a choice with my co-worker and the mom was pretty upset.  I don't want to upset the apple cart but there needs to be protection for all the other children with this situation.  In the midst of this I need to enjoy my life even though it is not fun at times.  Lord help me today as I deal with this parent and situation.

God's sense of humor

Today I got my car insurance taken care of.  I had to be a perk but it happened.  Today I gave my gifts.  Hardly acknowledged.  Complained about other stuff.  Glad I am not on the chopping g block today

The Obvious and Learning Lessons from Mistakes

 One of my students on the field trip has this thing about eloping, freaking out and when computers don't work to his satisfaction.  It can be something as simple as a setting, a pointer, or showing something on the smart board he does not like.  I pushed to have his mom on the trip and she says she can't go.  I wrote a letter stated that it was not safe for him and that he must stay back and the bosses pooed it.  Obviously the mom is not stupid and should go and my boss even though the letter was a wee bit harsh knows what I am saying is true.  But it is okay because I am going to make the best of it and just deal with it.  

Other than that it was a pretty good day.  The kids did alright and my lessons went okay.  

Thankful

 Yesterday was quiet.  It was a slow day.  I I am happy for slow cold days

Thankful for list

 I am thankful for the race yesterday and even though it was hard I finished.  I am thankful for a safe drive from the race.  I am thankful for keeping me safe on the drive and not getting hurt when I fell yesterday.  I am thankful for a great concert and a nice evening with Mike.  I am thankful for a quiet day at home. 

Most of all I am thankful for a relationship with God.  

I am also thankful for taking the time to listen to my husband and figuring him out.  For at work that the conspiracy theories they have show their true intelligence and that I don't have to make them happy.  

yesterday

I am grateful for tow easier days with two less kids.   I am happy for getting to be creative in my lessons and trying hard crafts.  I am thankful for a husband who loves me unconditionally.  Most of all the Lord who helps me everyday.   

I am flexible

I am kind

I am growing in the areas of people pleasing, keep others happy,  

I am a singer

I am a teacher 

I am smart

I have a quick mind

I am a proud slow runner

I am dependable

I am stubborn 

I do not give up easily

I am loved

I am trying new things

I am developing 

Most of all I am a child of God 

God Moves

 Yesterday I found out that my worst parent is leaving.  This morning I could not sleep and when I checked my email in the morning I found out she had sent me a nasty email at the same time I was having trouble sleeping.  

Then the toxic aide decided to quit and immediately she got sent to another school.  It is amazing how God works.

I am not looking for easy days or ones that I will be glorified but I see His hand at work.  When all the kids are basically hanging out with me for recess and leisure time.  

Yesterday was a good day.  No PDRs, no super behaviors and kids did what they usually do or should do.  

Thank you Lord for a good day!

God Made Me for This

 Yesterday I did the lesson in kids church.  Before I started a new kid came in.  I am not sure whether he is on the spectrum or anxiety.  But he found me and sat with me.  He had a hard time sitting still but I thought it was interesting he found me.  The lesson went well and I could feel the Lord helped me.  I am learning when I do things God's way it goes much better.  Thank you Lord for a good Sunday.

Meeting yesterday

 Yesterday I had a meeting with admin and my boss.  It was about having the rigor with a student and how I talked about church too much.  I actually sighed with relief because it was much better than expected.    I will not talk about my faith or do anything that is related to it.  Actually I am not surprised this has not happened sooner. 

Then about how I am teaching.  Which is fine because basically I have been given no direction.  I am getting weekly meetings with my boss.  That is fine which actually might help me.

As for the other things that make me nervous I need to say help Lord and stand back and watch the Lord work.

And the lies.  I am purposely going slower and pausing before I think.  

Thank you Lord for a job and not jumping to conclusions.

positive day

It looks like it was a good day.  Peace was in the room and I got lots done.  Thank you Lord for giving me a day of peace.   Help me in my meeting tomorrow 

Things to Look Forward to

 I have been making progress in the following areas.  I have been slowing down and waiting for attention from the kids.  I am working on slowing down with Math with only worrying about one child per group.  Also repetition is not bad either  or easy .  ELA I am starting read write  and handwriting without tears.  My Social Studies and Science are too bad.  I am working at creating thematic fun activities with my current curriculum.  I am doing CHAMPs

And I am doing some indoor recess activities.  

Yes I am meeting with admin tomorrow and I have no idea what will happen.  But I am staying tough and trusting in the Lord.