Legacy, Leaders, Living

Proverbs 15:1-3

15 A gentle response turns away anger,
but a harsh word stirs up wrath.
² The tongue of the wise treats knowledge correctly,
but the mouth of the fool spouts out folly.
³ The eyes of the Lord are in every place,
keeping watch on those who are evil and those who are good.

New English Translation (NET)

Generally I am totally spot on with my kids.  I try to do things right but yesterday I had it with my aide and I left as she was getting them.  Then she had someone come and get me because apparently she was not watching them or complained.  Initially I was embarrassed because I had got caught for once in a blue moon not watching my kids and then anger that she has done everything to make me less than desirable to my students.  I ask God how long will I be put down.  I ask God what is wrong with me.  How long will the terror of her anger be upon me and my students.  

I don't do things like the general teacher.  I think before I act.  I take the heat for some stuff that is really not my fa  I ult I try to be fair even if I don't personally like you.    All stuff that good leaders do.

But then I thought about some of the situations that have occurred and the Lord showed me them in a new way.  I can slightly see why she reacted the way she did.  But I wanting to know how long.

Sometimes I watch myself in action and I know it is the Lord guiding me.  I am able to be calm in difficult situations, react appropriately when all crazy breaks loose and be nice.  I see my students being nice.   But how long

I don't want to live in the past.  I see a sign about a baseball championship that occurred 10 years ago.  I don't want to be a part of a legacy but I want to live.

I am learning so much.  I am even doing new things at the end of the year.  I am fixing things.  But I know that would not be possible without God.  

I have an interview at another place for the summer.  Part of me wants it and part of me does not.  Also I am a bit concerned about the new.  What if I fail.  What if I am out of God's will.

I know I am supposed to be in that classroom this year.  I know I am supposed to go on that interview.  I know it is not an accident.  Lord have your way and will.  I choose to see things from a different perspective even if it makes me look back.  But I stand strong that the prophecy that was given to me in fourth grade that my playground is my training ground is so true today.