winks

Got to spend time over the weekend with family, hubs and friends.  Despite the chaos of today I see I am still loved.  Help me love others

Accepted welcome back to running

 I went for the second time in about a month to see all our running buds.  It was really nice seeing everyone.  I laughed and enjoyed the conversation and then when I returned from solo miles I was treated to hot coffee and more conversation.   I need this.  I need to get back to running and people who accept you for your unique self. 

The Trials of Gotcha but God's power

 Today I found out after the meeting I was being unofficially evaluated.  It made me mad that I literally had no warning and stuff I have not dealt with this year were suddenly brought up.  What is wrong with me that others can make mistakes and I get nailed for it all. I k

Despite the fact that this all happen  I know that God is much powerful.  He knows I need to work a few more years and that I am literally doing the best I can.  He has it under control. 

Pride

 The longer I am on this journey of this crazy year the more  I realize  how pride has gotten in my way.  I can't worry about other people think of me or how things occur.  

IT is so unsettling when you have stuff that is not finished and it is not certain where you will be next year.  

I guess I need to prepare for the worst.  I will be fired.  I will be at a crappy classroom next year.  I will end of at the same classroom next year.   I can't change others but I can change my own circumstances with the guidance of the HS. 

No Mistakes

 Today was a day where there were a lot of people making mistakes.  I made one and it just seemed magnified.  I was pretty discouraged with the whole tthing but then I thought about the good stuff I had did.  I can't change others but I am able to change my perspective with God's help

A Opportunity After Failure

 Today I got my eval.  IT was not good. I will not be tenured next year.  Lots was legit and some stuff was just crazy.  I  will do what I can and just do what I need to do. 

Out of My Confrol

 After listening to hours and hours of Mike's tirade of car shopping I just said I was wondering if we should pay off the house instead.  The next morning he went into a fit and basically put me my family and my wisdom down.  He apologized later but I am so tired.  Then I went to work and found out my staff is not happen with me again.  They can sit on their phones but if I take a time out on work I get nailed.  I am super tired of it all.