Yesterday I was summoned to the office. Sol's mom is hearing garbage from the toxic aide. I think moving forward I will just have conversations with the aide in private and email her private. If I need a moment I will just go to the bathroom or find a spot and scream.
Bosses have to be impartial and it is hard. Also the job my bosses do is impossible. I choose to not let people control me and just ask you Lord for help a lot.
Today I am with a situation with lots of emotions today. It is about Facts not Feelings.
I have been reflecting lately on things I wanted that I did not get from God. One was particular jobs like floating teacher, subject teacher and a presenter. I see that these would not have been good jobs for me nor is the respect there for those positions. I am also thankful for not getting things I wanted in the church such as music, pastor and in charge of stuff.
I am thankful for what He has given me. A decent staff, the wisdom to fix stupid stuff, a good husband, good parents and wonderful pets. I am able to use my gifts and talents in my work and in my ministry.
Thank you Lord for not giving me the stuff I wanted but the stuff I needed at just the right time.
Today it snowed unexpectantly. I am grateful for clear roads, getting to work quickly, snow shoveled, students who shared their pets, a productive day before 8 and help get a lot done. Learning about the importance of people not getting stars for stupid, and getting to be creative.
Yesterday was a tough day. I felt like I was ignored and when I did my creativity it was slammed. Today I shared a song with my mom and she critiqued it.
I had a good call with the mom I was supposed to talk to today. It was good.
I also worked with a child who was having a meltdown at the store. God gave me wisdom.
Last my elective was approved for puppets and got a good handle on my cultural day.
Still need wisdom with lazy and toxic aides, liers and mean parents. I can't change them but I can change myself.
It is easy to be kind to nice people but it is a challenge to be nice to people who don't have the best intentions. This week my one aide was absent two out of the five days and the lazy aide was gone all week. I choose to be nice even though it is not comfortable.
I have been setting new goals. Some have been great such as my creativity goal, Christ Control. But the food goal is such a stronghold. I guess even with my medication my heart is still struggling finding rest.
Well off to the gym. Tomorrow I do the music for kids church and the Bible verse using my puppet. Good things
I am finally off and I got sick. I am thankful I was able to make it but sad because I won't be able work out. I have this headache and it is just annoying.
So many people that angered me. My two staff who is lazy and my husband who had a hissy fit before his appointment.
I used my anger and just stressed eating things all week.
Then last night I had a dream where my hair was falling out and I kept on losing things.
Another opportunity to trust God. Praying for healing so I can do church tomorrow and be healthy Tuesday afternoon for Christmas.
I can't change others but I can rely on God to change me.
