Blown Away

 A lot has happened since I blogged last.  I went from sped to regular ed.  I went from upper eled to kinders.  Crazy huh?  Add to it all 10 of my flocks have emotional, behavior and mental disabilities.  But tomorrow I have 10 conferences  that will be challenging in different waysand I am blown away that God showed me how to do them. I will be talking to parents with academic deficits, future sped customers, Future Focusin and Adrerol Customers and students needing a therapist. One way was showing a house all of them will be completing.  Basic 8 skills that they should of gotten before they darkened me door but due to Covid it did not happen.  Thank you Lord for showing a positive visual I can help parents take the lead in properly parenting their child.  I trust you Lord when you told me that I was the only one who could do this.  I envy the teachers who spend 20 plus years in the same grade and know it so well inside and out.  I change every year and never master certain things.  This is my chance to get out of a failing system of sped and get some stability in my life.  It is chaos right now but if I just hold on each day I will eventually see the sense of this crazy. 

How to be in a Healthy and Godly Worship Team

 Sunday I got to see what kind of worship team I need to be in at the right time.  First of all the leader was spiritually, skillful and open to the things of the spirit.  She chose music that was simple to learn, a wide variety and easy to follow.  She used hand signals to the band.  No one in the band showed out.  Musicians only soloed at appropriate times.  They dressed with no one standing out.  The singer and the band was anointed and skilled.  All the glory was given to the Lord. It was music that the audience could follow.  It was in the style of the musicians but also to the congregation.  It is a tall order but in God's time it will happen.

Chaos to Christ's Control

 Summer has been quite the time for me to ask for God's control.  First a student who is so powerful he gives chaos wherever he is.  Spending the last few days of summer school just praying that I can get through it and trusting God for the answers in the moment.  Yesterday I had an experience where someone came in halfway through the class and caused complete chaos to a student who has been making strong strides to good choices.  I asked for wisdom and someone else gave me the answers.  I am so happy for all the experiences where I have a new opportunity to trust.

Now I am ending a few things and waiting for new things.  I am excited about working with younger kids and the opportunity to help kids as they transition from the pandemic to a hopefully more normal season in the classroom.  

Little Things

 I realized today that I can't change when a student won't do what I want.  I need to have a smaller goals and monitor all things.  Also I need to be stricter and monitor things to ridiculousness.  And keep my hands off kids at all costs. 

Glad tomorrow is it.

Not an accident

 Yesterday I happened to read on FB someone who was experiencing something that was identical to my former situation fifteen years ago.  I was able to share that I would be praying for her and that I understood her situation.  I know that was not an accident.

The other day I was sad initially because my boss was paying more attention to others than me.  Then I realized that she was stressed out.  No one else saw that but me.  And frankly I don't want to be one of her favorites because with that comes more work.  I don't need it. 

I noticed Joyce Meyer was at another church yesterday and I got to watch the program.  Definitely not an accident.  

Concern about today and retiring from the Chris show

 Over the weekend I listened to a lot of great messages.  Three of the messages were about allowing God to fix problems and not worrying over the stuff in the future.  There is nothing wrong with being prepared but sometimes when we have done all the right things we just need to allow the Lord to fix what we can't fix.

Yesterday I knew the fireworks were going to be crazy so I put on special music for my pets.  I really struggled sleeping and tried all the right things to be calm but I realized I should of called peace to my house and those in it.  I needed to ignore the complaining of others on FB who did not try to keep their pets and household calm.  Sometimes we try to fix the problem ourselves.  My mom tries to keep my dad happy.  I try to keep my husband happy.  That is good but sometimes all I can do is pray and move on with a calm delight.

Dumb dumb shared the worship experience with my husband.  He did not get it at all.  That is okay.  Calm delight. 

Closed and open doors

 I have not been in a regular services for quite some time.  It is hard because I know I wanted to be up there on the worship team.  Service started again and there was this dude that is getting on team that is even older than me.  I asked God why.  Then worship began and I listened to the service and the Lord took me aside and asked me do you really want to be a part of this without having an attitude.  I said no.  Without a attitude of the quality, songs chosen the Lord showed me really that this was not my place but children's churchw was.  

I am not sure how long my classes, my writing for the books, and the other stuff will last but this is what is in front of me and i will enjoy it.